That Stupid Woman

No, I am not referring to Sarah Palin, whom I do not believe is stupid. She's actually shrewd, though tragicomically misinformed and underqualified. I'm talking about the weird old Minnesota lady with the Barbara Bush white hair (which is all we saw of her) who, last Friday, stammered a ridiculous inarticulate belch at McCain's rally claiming that Obama was an "Arab." That pronouncement, and McCain's disavowal, was emblematic of the miserable sell-contradictory situation McCain has found himself in. It also gave him his last best opportunity for success.

Republican poll numbers had continued to plummet even after the Palin-McCain decision to attack Obama as a friend of radicals (and thereby an enemy of America), a strategy that had helped the Reps in earlier years. Of course in the face of the current overwhelming economic crisis, such personal vitriol held less sway than it would have during, say, the 1988 campaign when the country was recovering from a crash and in a better frame of mind. But it also seemed that the negative campaign, underscored by the media's highlighting of maniacal cries of hatred from Palin and McCain's roiled-up audiences, has turned off Independent voters and sent them scurrying into the camp of Cool Obama.

But when McCain, forced by the calumny of this stupid woman's ignorance, plainly rejected her attack and pulled the microphone away, he suddenly regained a degree of the mojo he had forfeited by submitting to the negative campaign. You could hear all the former admirers of the honorable "maverick" sighing in relief that the decent McCain had reemerged. And though it hasn't yet resulted in a resurgence of the polls, the bleeding seems to have stopped. If McCain manages to regain his self-respect, he could find some Independents and reluctant Republicans returning to his fold. That, Obewan Kenobe, is your only hope.

Of course if we examine more closely that exchange we can see some problems with McCain's response. Had he agreed with the woman, or tacitly accepted her premise, he would have been charged by the media with supporting a Great Lie. There would have been no way for him to recover from that. He really had no choice but to recoil. And as to his response to her claim that he is an Arab was "No, he's a decent family man." That, my friends, is, shall we say, unbelievably offensive to all decent Arab family people, of which there are probably many.

I must say that the implicit racism against Arabs in this country, as underscored not just by that but by the Obama campaign's fleeing from the word "Muslim", does not speak well for our national character. Obama's denial of being Muslim is factually true, but not once did he ever add that even if he were, it should not matter. Obama is smart enough to know the limits of tolerance in these religiously-charged times. That is a reason to respect his savvy, but not his idealistic purity.

But I digress. An amazing epilogue to the Minnesota incident was that the stupid woman, when interviewed afterward, still claimed that Obama was an Arab. Even after her Presidential candidate repudiated the idea in front of her face. She just preferred to believe the lie, because demonization of the enemy party is so comforting. Or perhaps because she was such a fucking moron. This also begs the question, how did such a nitwit score such a good seat at the rally? Do they give their prospective audiences an IQ test and the give preferential seating to those who score the lowest?

Apparently it takes either incredible stubbornness or transcendent idiocy to stay a supporter of McCain. I hate to simplify things, but the campaign seems less a conflict between red and blue, and a more a battle of intelligence vs. stupidity. This woman was the spokesperson for gullible inanity, but her minions seems be getting fewer and fewer. They still may rise again, though, so long as the embers of fear and prejudice and religious intolerance continue to be stoked. Did anyone see the clip of the reverend who made an invocation in Iowa prior to a McCain appearance? He asked God to show up all the gods of other countries who support Obama--gods such as "Hindu, Buddha, and Allah" --by bringing McCain in for the win. The degree of wild stupidity and ignorance in that statement (not to mention, as Keith Olbermann added, blasphemy), is breathtaking. Hindu is a religion, not a god. Buddha was a person, not a god. Allah is the same deistic fabrication as Yahweh and The Trinity. I'm surprised that the minister did not condemn Baal and Osiris and Jupiter.

But after this insane and malodorous invocation, did McCain disavow all the mistakes therein? He said not a word. Amen.

No Business Like It

There has been so much in the political campaign to write about that I have been tripping over my thoughts to finally get here. The overwhelming sense that I have now is that the arenas of politics and show business have become so intertwined that the most important political vehicle is Saturday Night Live, and that Tina Fey is a significant historical figure with probably more sway than her doppelganger Sarah Palin.

I could write so many blogs for every issue in this bizarre year. For instance, Republican campaign hypocrisy. For every charge made against Obama (and there are remarkably few against good ol' Joe Biden), there is a skeleton in the closet of either McCain or Sarah Alaska. For Ayers there is Palin's secessionist friends (and husband, let's not forget); for Rezko there is Keating; for the Reverend Wright there's Sarah's witch-hunting Zulu priest. Definitely a wash in terms of guilt-by-association, although the public airing of such nonsense is the only campaign strategy left for the Republicans, who, according to MSNBC (not the most objective source, but still), are airing 100% negative ads. The Obamites are going about 1/3 negative, about as much as Barack can stand without losing his ethical advantage.

But what has struck me in all of this wildly important and involving campaign is its entertainment value. Obviously, much of the pomp and circumstance of the conventions was pointed show business. From Barack's classical backdrop in Mile High Stadium to McCain's weird-looking green screen, the set decorators have had as much to do with the projections of their candidates as the spin doctors. And the choice of musical accompaniment has become politicized as well, with McCain's groups constantly usurping theme songs from uncredited and unsupportive musical groups.

But what has engaged me more than anything is my conception of the Sarah Palin story as something quintessentially American. Do I mean the rise of a small-town girl to prominence, as a female Horatio Alger? No, not exactly. I mean, her life is the perfect scenario for the Great American Musical."Suddenly Sarah," or something like it.

Combine elements of "Fiorello!" and "Evita" and you may start to see my idea. But there has rarely been a short life story whose characters and elements lend themselves so perfectly to quintessential musical comedy moments. You can begin with Sarah's Act I song of desire, sung on the even of one of her high school basketball matches, where the "Barracuda" yearns for something more than the admiration of the twenty-two other members of her class. Then have her do a duet with Todd as the Dude who wins her heart. Segue to her musical performance at the Miss Alaska pageant and her surprise defeat, which only girds her for further achievement--but not until she has her brood of kids (is there a "Do-Re-Mi" song there, about shooting moose? Kill a deer, a female deer.)

Another number can be written for her decision to run for mayor or governor. And then, of course, the great duet between her and McCain (okay, mostly McCain's song), when he decides on first glance that She is the One. This could be the First Act curtain--unless she responds with something to the tune of "I'll Never Blink Again."

There will be other subplots, of course, such as her daughter's pregnancy and the reluctant suitor who is forced to marry her. Or the mean Trooper who, like Poor Judd in "Oklahoma," threatens the peaceful existence of the Palin clan. Then we bring on the excitement of Sarah's RNC speech, "I said Thanks, but No Thanks". Maybe then a montage of the interviews the evil media (all dressed in demonic costumes designed by Julie Taymor), "In What Respect, Charley?" or "Katy, I Can See Russia?" or a snippet from her debate, "Can I Call You Joe?"

Yes, even with the exposure on SNL (to which Palin will, eventually, accede to in a smart campaign move), someone somewhere has to be creating a musical to celebrate this very odd candidacy. The troubling thing is, we are likely to see "Suddenly Sarah 2" in 2012. Unless the country regains its sanity, Sarah is ousted from her political seat, and actually gets to play herself on Broadway. I'd like that.