Is a Little TV a Dangerous Thing?

Last week the tech world was abuzz over Apple's latest Ipod innovation, the inclusion of a video component to its stupendously popular line of portable entertainment devices. I suppose the company had to depart from its ongoing production track of miniaturizing Ipods. Once they were down to gumstick size they couldn't get any smaller (of course they could, but try to decipher a readout on a thumbnail-sized Nano).

Hi-tech Luddite that I am, I didn't find this announcement all that intriguing, though the news commentators were lauding it like the second coming. That mystified me a bit, because as I recall, the Ipod of the previous generation, the Sony Walkman, did not evolve comfortably when it became a Watchman. All those folks striding down the street or peddling on their bikes were not likely to gaze for too long at the tiny screen for fear of running over a dog or a pedestrian or stumbling on a sidewalk crack. And how much fun was watching a tiny screen, not to mention the eye strain?

I figure the same limitations apply to the Ipod video screen. Reviewers have said that the image is crystal clear (one would hope, if it's three inches wide), but the glory of the Ipod was that it can be played while multitasking, providing musical accompaniment to the drudgery of daily tasks. Diverting one's attention to a video screen to watch an episode of "Desperate Housewives" pretty much disqualifies other activities, if safety is any consideration, and diminution of Eva Longoria's boobs is not a plus. For the present, available videos are limited to a few Disney/ABC programs, to be downloaded each for $1.99. The corporate thinking is that this will enable people who missed the original showing to catch up. My take is that with all the alternative TIVOs, DVRs, VCRs and webcasts--likely available to a person who owns an Ipod--the tiny TV is not all that seductive. Apparently the Apple execs thought so too, because they didn't raise the price on the renovated Ipod hardware.

My kneejerk reaction to the enhanced Ipodization of our culture was negative, but I've come to think that there may be a benefit, even to my glazed-eye perspective. I've realized that there are places where a mini-TV could be useful, especially in waiting rooms and staionery bikes in the gym and, of course, airports and planes. The key to all of this is the earphone. If there's no noise to distract me, I'm glad for others to occupy themselves with the doings on Wisteria Lane or on "Lost"'s island. It might even--cross my fingers--get them off the fucking cell phones with the interminable invasive yakking that makes me want to die. And with airlines economizing so radically, the end of in-flight movies is upon us, so the ability to view content on a personal little screen will keep passengers silent and air fares reasonable--maybe even helping some of the carriers out of bankruptcy.

Some time in the year 2006 or 2007 I might even be convinced to purchase a video Ipod, though I think I'd want one with extended capacity that could pack a few movies onto the hard drive. Of course this is not a major technical hurdle. Then all will be well with the world, until some asshole terrorist designs an Ipod out of plastic explosives. And don't think they're not trying already.